Was anyone here abused as a child?

[Julia]

I was sexually abused by a teacher from age 9 to 10. Every week, after swimming lessons, she'd take me to a storage room where no one ever came. This teacher was an old, ugly hag, and it was very traumatising. I completely dissociated through it every time. I come from an abusive family, so I had no one to turn to. If my siblings would have found out, they would have bullied me with it for sure. I told myself that as long as no one knows about it, it might as well not have happened. I'd make myself believe that it didn't happen. Eventually, I managed to suppress the memories completely. I did this with most of the traumatic events I experienced during childhood.

However, ever since that happened I spent an awful lot of time fantasising about being in a loving relationship with an adult. Every day in class, I was fantasising about being in a loving relationship with a woman in her twenties who would take me away and save me from my shitty life. Even during recess, I would always fantasise that she's there somewhere near, keeping a protective eye on me. Later, I also started having fantasies about sexual relationships with older boys.

Once I became an adult, the roles in my fantasies flipped, and I started imagining scenarios where I am the one who saves a young person from their shitty traumatic life and let them experience real love, although when I look at drawn korephilic content, I always feel like I'd want to be both of the characters.

The sexual abuse I experienced has left me with chronic hemorrhoids and anal fissures which I still struggle a lot with today.

A couple of years ago, in my early twenties, my mental health problems became impossible to live with, so I decided to try to remember all the things I had suppressed. In the back of my mind, I always knew that there is a lot of memories I keep suppressed, but I avoided thinking about that as well. It was at that point that the memories began to resurface. I've reached a point where I'm okay thinking and talking about it, but I will never set foot in an indoor swimming pool again.

[G@yWad69]

Yes. I was beaten severely. My dad picked me up and threw me one time. Sometimes I would stand at the door then slap me in the face as I walked by eith a grin on his face. He also punched me in the face repeatedly, one time he threw hard wooden toys at me. All before 13. When I got a little older it was mainly screaming, throwing away my things, breaking dishes. Thankfully his anger dissapated once I turned 18. I have a better relationship with my parents know but id rather die than be a minor again. One of the ideal things about having a yf is getting to spoil them and give them a better childhood than I had. One of the things I hate about modern day hysteria is that no one gives a shit about child abuse unless it sexual. “Oh you had sex with someone 3 years older than you, YOU POOR THING YOU SWEET LITTLE INNOCENT BABY ILL GIVE YOU ALL THE LOVE AND ATTENTION” “Oh your dad punched you and threw you? Brush it off and stop being dramatic” I even called Cps but they literally laughed in my face. I bet if I said my dad slept with me instead of beat me theyd actually do sometihing. They lack of care for kids who have been phsycially or emotionally abused by antis is what makes me think the fears of AMSC isnt actually about protecting children from abuse, because if it was they wouldnt laugh at kids being emotionally abused by there parents or hit/beat their kids. I wonder how many kids lie about being SAd or groomed when in actuallity there abuse was phsycial just so someone would pay attention to them