The worst thing about being a map

A place to talk about Minor-Attracted People and MAP/AAM-related issues.
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mrlolicon93
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The worst thing about being a map

Post by mrlolicon93 »

The worst thing about being a map is that the more you age and get older as the years go by it becomes more difficult to actually connect with and relate to children despite us being attracted to them.

An adult man in his 20s or even early 30s is not that far removed from a young girl of today's generation but a man in his 50s onward is and this will be the case for many young pedos one day too.

Are we just destined to die alone?
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FairBlueLove
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Re: The worst thing about being a map

Post by FairBlueLove »

It is funny that I wanted to start a thread with a similar title, which I posted a while ago in the Italian section on BLOL. The "worst thing" (or "greatest drama" per direct translation) in that case essentially rotated around the sparseness of MAPs and AAMs.

While for obvious reasons we tend to think mostly about MAP issues related to the society and legality, it is a good "exercise" to think about the bare human issues of kid-adult relationships.

I think that Fragment's answer is a great one. I would add that there are kids who have platonic attraction to adults, even old men - I was one of them. If we were lucky enough to find someone like that, it would bring a lot of happiness to our lives because they care for us, even if it's not in a romantic way. The problem, also in this case, is sparseness.

On the other side, consider that even most adult-adult relationships don't last forever, and not just because of lack of attraction. While being MAP is for sure an exacerbating condition, the risk of dying alone is more diffused than ever in present times.
When society judges without understanding, it silences hearts that yearn for connection.
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BLueRibbon
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Re: The worst thing about being a map

Post by BLueRibbon »

I am personally struggling with this issue. It's one of several reasons why I'm doing Mu.

I did something else that I thought would make me feel better (not related to MAP activism), but it just made everything worse.
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mrlolicon93
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Re: The worst thing about being a map

Post by mrlolicon93 »

BLueRibbon wrote: Mon Oct 07, 2024 3:34 pm I am personally struggling with this issue. It's one of several reasons why I'm doing Mu.

I did something else that I thought would make me feel better (not related to MAP activism), but it just made everything worse.
I know how you feel.
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JessPa1ge
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Re: The worst thing about being a map

Post by JessPa1ge »

Not being able to act out my Attractions without the consequences of the "normal" world
Hi I'm Jess, TransMtF looking to find friends and community
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Lennon72
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Re: The worst thing about being a map

Post by Lennon72 »

Ignorance is the problem that I have. People who don't even know me are out there judging me.
lightseeker
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Re: The worst thing about being a map

Post by lightseeker »

mrlolicon93 wrote: Fri Oct 04, 2024 3:55 am Are we just destined to die alone?
Yes, and we share this destiny with many other people, like gays and lesbians, heterosexuals without wife, husband, and kids, and many more. It's a good choice to learn to live self-sufficiently. Best outcome might be to have been friends to some boy(s) or girl(s) in the past when we're young, and still be friends with them later on. Then they can still be part of your old age. Or, as Fragment mentioned, build a community which is not your biological family but feels like one.
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John_Doe
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Re: The worst thing about being a map

Post by John_Doe »

mrlolicon93 wrote: Fri Oct 04, 2024 3:55 am The worst thing about being a map is that the more you age and get older as the years go by it becomes more difficult to actually connect with and relate to children despite us being attracted to them.

An adult man in his 20s or even early 30s is not that far removed from a young girl of today's generation but a man in his 50s onward is and this will be the case for many young pedos one day too.

Are we just destined to die alone?
It's hard for me to understand why it would be easier for a man in his 20s or early 30s to relate to children than a man in his 50s. By the time you finish puberty I would imagine that most people are very different than who they were as children but even then an elderly man can connect with and relate to children as human beings or if he's among the 'young at heart' (people love their grandchildren, for example). In terms of age categories, I think a 20-something-year-old is very far removed from children.

It's possible that there's some other thread I vaguely have in mind where this comment would be better suited (editing this in- I remember a 'will it work' or something like that thread where I think it was you who mentioned long-term relationships between pedophiles and children but I think the transient and fragile nature of attractiveness applies here too) but it seems to me that the biggest problem with being a pedophile (outside of brutal discrimination and the stigmatization of pedophilia) is the issue with long-term relationships and even becoming less attractive to children as one gets older (for all that means to someone if they can't act on any mutual interest they might share with a child anyway but I think it makes a difference for most people in terms of making the fantasy feel more plausible) but that applies to teleiophiles as well. I am probably always going to have a non-exclusive preference for girls and women in their teens, twenties and thirties, for example. I also think that, if people are honest, becoming less conventionally attractive is one of the primary; if not the single most important, root causes of mid-life crises (there are also the normative age roles we're bound to and who you're allowed to be as a middle-aged man/woman but even then, I think a lot of that is less strictly 'enforced' if someone looks young, they might be able to get away with more that they would otherwise be penalized for if they looked as though they were middle-aged because, as I mentioned in another thread, to some degree your social image is wrapped up with what you physically look like, people will project a certain personality on to you based largely on that alone), although I suspect my sexual anhedonia might have a lot to do with aging (and I don't really have the 'natural highs' I had when I was younger, I'm not as moved by certain sensory experiences, etc. It's possible that increasing my masturbation frequency would help but that would come with various health problems).

I almost envy pedophiles who have a preference for prepubescent children though because, in terms of personality/psychology, I can 'relate' to younger children in some ways more than I can't to adults or maybe I should say that it's easier to understand them and get along with them (given their sincerity, their lack of malice or deep cruelty-if that's not romanticizing them because I know that children can be cruel, their 'simple-mindedness,' their straightforwardness; unless maybe we're talking about preteens I don't think they're inclined toward intentionally ambiguous communication or being 'passive aggressive' in a way that involves that, their fun-oriented outlook on life, etc. - I could probably better word this) but I prefer women (even when it comes to children, I am not remotely attracted to 5-year-olds and I can't see a 5-year-old not being as I've described, I also can't see one being really sexual although I have heard women say that they were at 5).
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notetaker
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Re: The worst thing about being a map

Post by notetaker »

mrlolicon93 wrote: Fri Oct 04, 2024 3:55 am Are we just destined to die alone?
Doesn't everybody! Even lovers on a suicidal tryst must face their demise alone.
I think we should relish the moments we spend with our young friends and not worry about trifling endings. All things come to an end, however much we'd love to hold on.
My tale is a tragic one. Irrespective it is my tale and I wouldn't have it any other way.
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