Struggling with incestophilia! very new to these groups.

[unitycutie]

Hello Ive never really posted in forums before, its a little bit before my gen but I have been dealing with incestophilia my whole life even when I look back, I dont know why I have these thoughts or were they came from but they do unsettle me as much as they comfort me in a way. Its recently came back just as strong with someone related to me, Ive never really thought of him that way even though growing up Id have uncomfortable feelings around him every now and then. My thoughts aren't graphic but its just desperate, sometimes being with him feels so romantic or Ill just have thoughts about how perfect he is for me, I always feel like he's leering at me. I know I will talk to my therapist about this at sometime, but I don't know how or what to do if I don't even have the courage to bring it up to someone. I dont know if these thoughts are serious, or im just so lonely im romanticizing him. Ive never acted on these thoughts but I always fear I will. I dont know what to do.

[BLueRibbon]

Welcome.

Please share more information (carefully, without potentially identifying yourself) if you'd like some help with this.

[unitycutie]

Welcome.

Please share more information (carefully, without potentially identifying yourself) if you'd like some help with this.

well Im not sure what else to share but With always having incestophilia it used to mainly be my cousins Ive had these thoughts over. and recently with this other family memeber its been really strong for a few weeks now. sometimes the feeling fades and I just feel gross or annoyed by it but sometimes i dont.