MAP Forum

bnkywuv wrote: Thu Jul 30, 2026 6:43 am

MAPallmylife66 wrote: Thu Jul 30, 2026 3:51 am

bnkywuv wrote: Thu Jul 30, 2026 2:51 am

I am unsure if physical evolution would be as big of a need as we've developed a way to control our environment so much, but i do think we could (and are) evolving neurologically. Maybe the increase of MAPs and AAMs is an evolutionary response to touch starvation and abstinence/sexual deprivation and strict parental control.

Even though I'm an evolutionist I do feel the need to believe in an afterlife too. Even if it's isn't real, I need the hope just to keep myself alive.

I wasn't sure if this was a place that I could talk about my experiences, but since you brought up the afterlife. I'm a believer in reincarnation. In fact I had a past life regression hypnosis session. Actually two of them, and I was a pedophile in my most recent past life, but in that life my attractions and behaviors came from abuse. In that life, I was the son of an abusive preacher in the 1800's in the Southern US. My father in that life abused my mother physically, and me sexually. This caused me so much psychological distress, that I began acting out in the same way on others. I even ended up accidentally killing a little girl in that life, that ended up getting me hanged. That life was so traumatic, that the trauma has reached over time into this life, and is likely why I'm the way I am in this life.

I had suspected that it had something to do with a past life for many years before this, but wasn't sure until I was under hypnosis. It was so horrific, that my subconscious refused to show me the gory details. It was more just a sense of what happened. This experience definitely gave me much empathy for abused children. It also is the reason I have always hated religion.

This sounds like the typical anti "you were abused and that's why you're a pedophile!" thing. I'm not a believer in that so that doesn't resonate with me much, but I AM thankful that it has made you more empathetic, something really necessary in today's crazy world!

I'm not a believer in reincarnation per se, but there is evidence that some memories can be passed down through genetics (which is why we have primal instincts still).

I've also never been much into past lives in certain contexts. Sometimes it seems to give the idea that suffering is necessary which I'm not a big believer in. I personally don't try to rationalize my pain anymore. I accept that many things in my life, like suffering, don't happen for any reason. Doing that really damaged my health for many years.

I'd caution with hypnosis though. Hypnotism often creates false memories in session can make one highly susceptible to suggestion.

Still I find these types of things really fascinating even if they don't jive with my own beliefs. Some people can tolerate more pain than others. Some learn through suffering, others don't.

For me, I did have things that felt like past memories AND present happenings (although I tended to view them as my current life experiences, not spiritual experiences/extraterrestrial visitations, didn't pick up on that until years later around 10 up into my teens!) where I'd suddenly zone out and hear "voices" or feel touch, pick up scents or tastes. I'd also get very strong pereiodolia and synesthesia, as well as intense mystical experiences that felt very otherworldly and unlike an Earthly peace or bliss I've ever felt...except maybe cannabis.

Once while I was at my grandmother's house when I walked to the kitchen instead of seeing her kitchen under the moonlight, I saw her kitchen as an overview of an ocean with a mote and a castle on one side, and I literally heard an orchestra playing before I realized what I was looking at. There were also some creatures swimming, flying, and climbing around on stuff too!

I saw the aforementioned organism beings a lot. A LOT!!!! They all had a similar shape and look to them, even feeling or aura. They'd tell me they were my real family, my parents, my ancestors, as well as my offspring and future generations after. This was confusing because I didn't even know past/future lives were a thing, nor did I perceive them as being past life visitations or memories. It was more like the past, present AND future events were happening so close together I had no way of separating them. However I couldn't care less. They gave me comfort during the times my parents were busy arguing over something, which happened a lot.

As I got older though and more time passed in this life and I began to hear about past lives and reincarnation that's when i developed the idea they could have been past lives or future life visitations. But more often than not I got the feeling it's more of a continuum of consciousness that doesn't have a definitive "time" or "space" like we're familiar with, which is why it was so muddied.

As a kid I felt them as internal experiences even if they were immensely profound. I never dragged my parents or siblings into it and I never asked them if they saw them too. I never once pestered them to come into my room to see them dancing from the window in the garden, resting atop my lap or crawling around in my bed. I somehow knew they were personal, subjective experiences (kind of a curse now) and I never thought they were externally, verifiably real, nor that anyone else had these kinds of ideas until I heard about religion...then everything kinda began to go downhill for me at that point, that was also the time I was forced to move in with my unstable anti parent.

I have a few doodles of these creatures that I'll post sometime soon. Might post them here in the art section along with some MAP/AAM advocacy!!!