MAP Forum

Officerkrupke wrote: Wed Jun 25, 2025 7:07 pm Julia this is very brave of you to do! I'm publicly out, but not by choice. Basically, I live in a city, and I'm kind of a publicly known pedophile there. I've gotten physical threats of violence several times in public. How did your friends react? Mine don't know that I'm a MAP yet.

Hi there! I live in a village where the locals are so chronically offline that I’m mostly known as the quirky goth chick who strolls to the forest every night with a bottle of Scotch for some stargazing. You know, just your typical village life! Threats of physical violence have mostly been confined to the internet, but wow, have there been a lot of those.

When it comes to the friends I thought I had, their reactions have been a mixed bag. About 50/50, really. Most of my pals back then were from leftist and post-leftist circles. Those who cling tightly to their beliefs felt the need to vehemently oppose me for the sake of approval of their fellow ideologues. Meanwhile, the more open-minded and critical thinkers stood by my side, which was a refreshing surprise!

Responses have ranged from the dramatic, "I can’t believe I ever trusted you!" to the surprisingly supportive, "I’ve thought about this before, and I think you’re right." And then there was that one friend who said something like, "One of the people who let me couch-surf when I had nowhere else to go was a MAP, and they really opened my eyes." Talk about a plot twist!

If you’re considering coming out to your friends—which I assume is your goal, given the word "yet" in your last sentence—let me offer a couple of tips. First, please don’t come out to everyone at once like I did. It’s like throwing a surprise party that no one wanted—overwhelming and a bit chaotic! Instead, pick a few folks you think will be supportive.

Second, really think about who’s actually going to have your back. My coming out was a crash course in human behaviour. Turns out, people who are all about groupthink will prioritise their little cliques over you faster than you can say "schadenfreude."

Lastly, if you’ve got friends who you suspect won’t support you, ask yourself if they’re worth the hassle. Personally, I’m done wasting time on people who wouldn’t stand by me. That energy is better spent pushing the movement forward.

That’s all the wisdom I can muster for now. Please stay safe, and don’t hesitate to reach out if you have more questions!