MAP Forum

I hate how you can do all the right things by a child. Be their friend, buy them gifts, listen to their stories, play with them, be there for them in times of stress. But all that love and affection is written off as abuse and “grooming”. I dont believe grooming is real. If its manipulation just say its manipulation. But heres the thing, antis know its not manipulation which is why they refuse to call it that, they know that its a display of love and affection, but calling it love would humanize us, and we cant have that, so they invent a new phrase called “grooming” to describe a non parental adult showing genuine love and affection for a minor. It makes zero sense that a display of love and affection to an adult would do a 180 and become a display of abuse and manipulation to a child despite it being the exact same thing. If I buy a loved one a gift and they are an adult because I enjoy seeing them happy and smile its “love”, but if I buy a loved one a gift and they are a child because I enjoy seeing them happy and smile its suddenly abuse?! Children arent magical creatures or a seperate species, it makes no sense that one thing is love in one age group but suddenly abuse in the next. Make it make sense.

It's certainly a fine line, though, and there are a great number of predatory maps who actively engage in this coercion. Grooming definitely exists, too. A better simile would be 'conditioning'.

G@yWad69 wrote: Wed Jun 04, 2025 1:09 pm they know that its a display of love and affection, but calling it love would humanize us, and we cant have that, so they invent a new phrase called “grooming” to describe a non parental adult showing genuine love and affection for a minor. It makes zero sense that a display of love and affection to an adult would do a 180 and become a display of abuse and manipulation to a child despite it being the exact same thing. If I buy a loved one a gift and they are an adult because I enjoy seeing them happy and smile its “love”, but if I buy a loved one a gift and they are a child because I enjoy seeing them happy and smile its suddenly abuse?!

Yes, exactly. It is a victimological trick, to make a minor person a victim in advance in order to justify one's punitive actions and dehumanize actions of an adult. And since in the current society minors do not have their own voice or their voice is blocked by various services, this trick works and supports itself, forcing others to form false and frightening images in their imagination.

Dropping off flowers for an elderly neighbor is a nice thing to do.
If others know you as a "pedophile", that same act is now seen as malicious with an ulterior motive to "get closer with her grandkids".

Everything you do is now scrutinized and flagged as "abuse in progress".

The world is not a kind place to us.

Aspire6 wrote: Wed Jun 04, 2025 7:13 pm Dropping off flowers for an elderly neighbor is a nice thing to do.
If others know you as a "pedophile", that same act is now seen as malicious with an ulterior motive to "get closer with her grandkids".

Everything you do is now scrutinized and flagged as "abuse in progress".

The world is not a kind place to us.

You know dropping off flowers or helping out an elderly neighbour is quite nice! Reading that also made me think about numerous times I've heard people claim that others were "manipulating" the elderly. In all the cases I've experienced it's always an elderly person with little to no connection with the world, and an substantial amount of financial wealth. The accusation being that the youth involved are exclusively investing time and love into the elderly person as an active attempt to gain access to that wealth through life style or will.

But, just like with children that's kind of bullshit isn't it? Like, it's bad of course if they are being malicious or otherwise abusive to the elderly person, but every relationship we have is built on a system of reciprocity. Whether it be financial or social or emotional wealth exchanged there's always a give or take, or the relationship isn't really much of a relationship is it?

I think in the case of elderly, and children these arguments that any true relationship is impossible and it's all manipulation says more about the accuser than the accused. To me it tells me that they view the supposedly exploited individual as largely worthless or a burden. Meaning to them there must be so secret pay off in the end that isn't advertised on the surface. Such as money or sex. It's both degrading, and perplexing that they're suggesting something dirty about money and sex being part of the exchanged in a healthy relationship. It's like they are claiming the supposed victim is so worthless and burdensome that they aren't worth truly loving, only exploitable for a singular reductive resource.

I understand what you mean. I totally get it. But what you have to understand deep down, and you probably know this, is that a lot of this stuff is rooted in fear. Realistically, the majority of the people, if not all, don't see anything wrong with a person buying their kids something nice or doing something nice for them; it all depends on the context you do it in that may make it creepy or not. A lot of people, especially nowadays, isn't going to trust someone, or at the very least, look at the person as it is a bit suspicious when trying to befriend their child because simply, that person is a complete stranger that they do not really know. It's only people who are within their bubble like a teacher, counsellor, a parent's friend, her child friend's parents, or whatever. It's only people who are in the bubble that they are comfortable with, and to a degree, it's understandable because of the fear that they have. I do not like this world at all, even though there are things that I like about it, but for now, let's keep pressing on until the End comes. Fear begets hatred, and hatred begets violence.