MAP Forum

It would help a lot if you didn't restrict PMs for new users. I came here looking for a safe space to talk and yet - not just from the above reminder/warning - I find myself waling on eggshells within the first day afraid to say anything at all lest it be construed as 'against the rules'. Considering the entire premise of this website couldn't be any more against the rules of society if it tried, I expected a more liberal environment, What a shame.

There’s no PMs for anyone. That’s not the purpose of this site.

Even if we allowed PMs the rules would apply to them and moderators and admins would be allowed to read the content.

Being against the rules of society means we need to be all the more careful about keeping our users inside of legal bounds.

https://www.boywiki.org/en/Boylover.net

184 arrests were allegedly made as a result of a clear net site not being careful.

We can't just allow users to rock up here and start contacting established users after they could have been observing them for months. We'd be endangering our user base by doing that.

You are also reminded not to complain in thread; it's disruptive and that could be another strike.

dreamscumtrue the rules of the site are there to protect the users.
We are actually lucky that we even have a forum like this on the clearnet.
And please don't complain about stuff that is not allowed.
It gives off a bad vibe about this place. When in reality that's not the case.
The mods, admins and other active users are already trying hard to make the site work and to let MAP voices be heard on the internet.

Think of it this way. The main players in social media, Facebook, X, Discord, Tumblr, etc have already made their stance clear. MAPs cannot be trusted to use their private messaging facilities without grooming some child. For one self-identfied MAP to be caught doing this is a "told you so" moment and massive negative publicity, even if there are "anti-abuse" groups such as BACA and Pedogate with exponentially more offenders in their ranks.

Given we are making some of these tools available to MAPs with relatively little censorship, we need to make sensitive decisions about restricting features that depend upon the medium in use, and ensuring it's longevity.

Even now, there are clear net MAP social media such as Fediverse (Mastodon and Pleroma instances) and Matrix (OMC and PCMA) that allow private messaging from new members, as this is part of the design. Most of these are hidden from public view, so it is a lot harder for a predatory anti to assess his or her target without an account. This could lead to such lurkers getting kicked out and blacklisted, as happened in PCMA.

But it is also no coincidence that the more lax MAP social networks are the ones that get their domains stolen and even squatted by antis within months. This has been tested in the Petri dish of Mastodon, as socials such as NNIA, MAPSupport and Yesmap Fediverse, while not as explosively popular, have outlasted the instances with next to no rules.

Compare BoyChat.org, it has no private messaging or pic upload, and has existed for almost 3 decades.

dreamscumtrue wrote: Thu Jun 05, 2025 3:56 am I came here looking for a safe space to talk and yet - not just from the above reminder/warning - I find myself waling on eggshells within the first day afraid to say anything at all lest it be construed as 'against the rules'.

As long as you aren't intentionally and flagrantly trying to violate the rules, the mods are pretty lenient. You're more likely to have a moderator remove a post or part of a post than be issued a warning or banned for it.

Considering the entire premise of this website couldn't be any more against the rules of society if it tried, I expected a more liberal environment, What a shame.

What kind of thing do you want to share or say? As long as it doesn't advocate for breaking the law, or involve erotica, you can say almost anything you like.

If you're disappointed that this isn't a softcore porn site, I think you'd be missing the point. The idea (at least in my understanding) is to build a lasting, publicly-facing community. A site that makes erotica it's focal point is likely to end up putting off the public (for comparison, contrast a public organization for gay rights, with a porn shop that caters to gay people), as well as running a heightened risk of being attacked, or taken down.