MAP Forum

Would a long term relationship between a minor and an adult even work?

Considering the massive age difference and where both people are in life i am not so sure.

Not to mention when the child grows up they will not be the same person and throughout their youth they are constantly changing.

How long does a long-term relationship have to be? And how clear cut is AoA?
My AoA is 8 to 10, though I could be attracted to girls that are a year older or younger. 4 years feel like enough for a long-term relationship, but if you were also non-exclusive (as I am), it could last longer.
I was thinking most adult-minor relationships would be pederastic like, where MAPs would train as private tutors and serve like a teacher or nanny as a profession. If you didn't have a taboo of AMSC, it just makes sense for MAPs to be involved in bringing up children. You have a group of people that naturally pay more attention to children, so why not make use of that? That's also my evolutionary theory of why pedophilia exists (since the argument that it's to encourage breeding at the earliest possible point doesn't explain true pedophilia).

It seems to be becoming less and less common in the MAP community due to the hysteria surrounding adult-minor relationships in general. But you can still find some discussion of platonic relationships with YFs (young friends) and if you look back a little further, these discussions were even more common.

I think it's true that most relationships would not resemble adult-adult heterosexual relationships. It is possible though, that with a particular person your love for them would end up overriding the more superficial concern of "attraction" and you could maintain a relationship into their adulthood with marriage, kids and all the standard fixings.

I actually experienced this to a degree. When I was in my 20s I dated a guy in his late teens (legal in my country) and we ended up staying together until he was in his mid 20s. Rather than me breaking up with him because he had "aged out" of my attraction zone, he was the only that broke up with me because he felt that he wanted to experience life outside of our relationship.

Other MAP/ YF relationships don't even function as bidirectional romantic relationships. The romantic feelings are one-sided on the part of the MAP with the YF enjoying time with their older partner as someone that cares for and guides them. Like Lark says, there is likely to be a pedagogic nature to the relationships similar to pederasty in a variety of ancient cultures (I see this especially in terms of BL relationships but see no reason the same couldn't apply to GLs).

In such cases, since the younger partner isn't romantically interested in the older, the relationship will naturally transition into a friendship over time, ideally with the strong bonds formed leading to a strong connection, even when both people are adults. Here's an example from BC of how such a relationship may end up in the end- with the MAP being invited to be best man at the former YF's wedding:
https://www.boychat.org/messages/1629080.htm

So would it work? "I love this person and want to stay with them forever just as they are now" likely won't work. But if you consider relationships outside of that model there are many types of relationships that a MAP and minor could engage in that would be fulfilling. To reference Law and Order: SVU the love would a "special kind of love".

I don't believe in adult relationships, so relationships between men and boys I judge the same way.