Page 1 of 1
As a AAM, how should I deal with the fact that Im unlikely to be able to have a deep friendship or even be with an adult
Posted: Thu Dec 25, 2025 11:53 am
by Starlit
I know deep down I want to be able to date older people, but I also know adults are heavily frowned upon dating a minor. Even though Im above the age of consent, so it’s less of a legal issue and more that I don’t think I’d be able to find an adult I could have a deep, meaningful relationship with. I’ve talked with my boyfriend about it and he thinks I should at least wait until Im 18 to do that. Another thing I worry about is that I’d just put some innocent person in danger by trying to date them. Lastly I worry that the kind of person willing to take the risk to be with me, might just be doing it for sex. For me all of these thoughts scare me and I really wanna know what you guys think would help.
Re: As a AAM, how should I deal with the fact that Im unlikely to be able to have a deep friendship or even be with an a
Posted: Fri Dec 26, 2025 8:09 am
by BLueRibbon
My honest answer, rather than an emotional one, is to just wait.
There are a lot of trappy laws that could still apply to you as a minor despite being over the age of consent.
Re: As a AAM, how should I deal with the fact that Im unlikely to be able to have a deep friendship or even be with an a
Posted: Fri Dec 26, 2025 9:05 pm
by Starlit
BLueRibbon wrote: Fri Dec 26, 2025 8:09 am
My honest answer, rather than an emotional one, is to just wait.
There are a lot of trappy laws that could still apply to you as a minor despite being over the age of consent.
Yea, I think you're right. I wouldn't want me or anyone else to get in trouble
Re: As a AAM, how should I deal with the fact that Im unlikely to be able to have a deep friendship or even be with an a
Posted: Sun Dec 28, 2025 1:21 pm
by Condemned
I'd also check your local "age of majority" laws. Some states, you have to reach the age of 19 to be a legal adult.
Re: As a AAM, how should I deal with the fact that Im unlikely to be able to have a deep friendship or even be with an a
Posted: Thu Feb 05, 2026 4:01 am
by bnkywuv
Starlit wrote: Thu Dec 25, 2025 11:53 am
Another thing I worry about is that I’d just put some innocent person in danger by trying to date them. Lastly I worry that the kind of person willing to take the risk to be with me, might just be doing it for sex. For me all of these thoughts scare me and I really wanna know what you guys think would help.
Joined today and saw this. This is what I love about so many AAMs. They're not "stupid kids and teens who don't know what they're doing" like society says. You're very aware of the fact that interacting with a MAP could lead not just harm to you, but to the adult. You're aware that it's not just "the poor minor could get hurt by the big bad adult". To add, yes. There are many adults who would want just the sex and nothing else, and as person with way more empathy than I can deal with, this hits hard and hurts me. I hate to see youth suffering like this. I was one of them.
Do you have any friends you can talk to about this? Family? I'd love to be friends, but of course the risks are high. Seems even friendships can be a risky leap of faith even when no sexual interaction is involved, and that is a real shame.
I know it may not be much, but maybe I can at least let you know there are people who would help you if they could, if only society allowed. More importantly, who do understand and care.