I Hate Parents Like This (Repost from private section)

[Brain O'Conner]

Here's a video about a 12-year-old girl getting scolded and grabbed on the neck by her mother after coming home at 1am and then the mother beating the girl off screen that is implied at the end of the video as discipline: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDEdWwe1OLc. It's one thing to be worried about your kid coming home very late because you want her to be safe and excel in school, but the way this mother handles it, along with a lot of other parents, is just disgusting to me, especially with the YouTube comments agreeing with the mother and how we should bring back this kind of parenting as it brings back morals or what not. Just a bunch of morons. Just want to know your guy's two cents on this. This is one of the reasons why I hate the concept of parenting. If I were to adopt a child, it wouldn't be in a parental kind of way. No, it would be more like a friendship kind of thing. I know people would go absolutely crazy if I were to say that and say things how that wouldn't work and stuff.
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[FlowerLurker]

Here's a video about a 12-year-old girl getting scolded and grabbed on the neck by her mother after coming home at 1am and then the mother beating the girl off screen that is implied at the end of the video as discipline: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDEdWwe1OLc. It's one thing to be worried about your kid coming home very late because you want her to be safe and excel in school, but the way this mother handles it, along with a lot of other parents, is just disgusting to me, especially with the YouTube comments agreeing with the mother and how we should bring back this kind of parenting as it brings back morals or what not. Just a bunch of morons. Just want to know your guy's two cents on this. This is one of the reasons why I hate the concept of parenting. If I were to adopt a child, it wouldn't be in a parental kind of way. No, it would be more like a friendship kind of thing. I know people would go absolutely crazy if I were to say that and say things how that wouldn't work and stuff.
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I may go on a little essay here, but, really, what you saw in the video is NOT parenting in any way, it's abuse. physical, psychological, etc. parenting, healthy parenting, is usually about lowering yourself to your child's level, respecting their autonomy, their mind, but also not forget to explain the world and give them attention. you may call it friendship in some way, but healthy parenting is rather like... a good master/apprentice experience, but with familial bond to it. it's about passing the experience and helping, bur also about respecting and caring. in an ideal world, of course. people rarely manage to find the golden middle in-between abuse/strict parenting and soft parenting/neglect or putting a child on a pedestal

[Brain O'Conner]

I may go on a little essay here, but, really, what you saw in the video is NOT parenting in any way, it's abuse. physical, psychological, etc. parenting, healthy parenting, is usually about lowering yourself to your child's level, respecting their autonomy, their mind, but also not forget to explain the world and give them attention. you may call it friendship in some way, but healthy parenting is rather like... a good master/apprentice experience, but with familial bond to it. it's about passing the experience and helping, bur also about respecting and caring. in an ideal world, of course. people rarely manage to find the golden middle in-between abuse/strict parenting and soft parenting/neglect or putting a child on a pedestal

I agree with what you said. I don't necessarily view parenting in of itself as the contents that are in the video, it's just that I hate when society is fine with parents treating their kids like in the video, but is not fine with an adult and minor of nearly any age engaging in a sexual interaction, and thus, the man being looked as the worse person in the world. It's hypocritical and sickening. As for your description of parenting ---- being a good master/apprentice experience, that can be applied to really... every relationship. Every kind of relationship has a degree apprenticeship and master roles simply due to the fact that we all have something we can learn and mature from one another. So, to me, outside of the biological connections and familial bonds, there is no such thing as parents/parenting.

[Not Forever]

---- being a good master/apprentice experience, that can be applied to really... every relationship. Every kind of relationship has a degree apprenticeship and master roles simply due to the fact that we all have something we can learn and mature from one another.

Now that you mention it, this video could also serve as evidence of how a minor should need trusted adult figures outside the family environment (regardless of their nature). I mean… can a situation really be considered healthy where the only adults a minor actually deals with are their parents? Parents and Institutions (where there is no bond of trust), essentially as if no form of supportive community existed at all.

In practice, a minor in a bad situation either turns to institutions or has nothing—there’s no other place to take refuge.

Even on an educational level it’s far from ideal, since they can’t learn from anyone else except the internet, school, and parents. Parents who, ideally, are also busy.

Hasn’t any researcher studied or problematized the lack of this kind of thing?