Is “Grooming” Just The Regular Courtship Process?

[DANAT4T]

But as a kid I just felt guys were out of my league, why would a man with money and independence be interested in a kid who can't even stay out after dark? I had nothing to offer, he had everything, I didn't pursue guys mostly because it seemed pointless.

Not all men/older people have money or independence. Some adults may not like staying out after dark. Even if they did, when people love people so much, they may sacrifice those things becuase the person they desire to be with is more important. Some adults may love doing the same things younger age groups do. Not all adults like drinking, going to the pub or going to nightclubs. Also not all adults are interested or ready for sex, they may be virgins or lack the experience.

In normal courtship scenarios, a man wants money and independence also. It would just be to a lesser extent. A perfect example would be an 'upper middle' class 30 year old man courting a 'lower middle' class 21 year old woman.

[Bookshelf]

I wonder how much of that trauma is an attempt from the 'victim' to construct the memories as something negative, as to not have to deal with the loss involved when the separation happens. Once the relationship ends like that, there's practically no chance it'll ever start up again — even if it does, it'll never be the same.

It's probably easier to convince yourself it was never good to begin with rather than work through the loss.

[OnionPetal]

Is “Grooming” Just The Regular Courtship Process?

'Grooming' means to clean or care for an animal. The usage more common to recent tabloids like 'The Guardian' denotes a modern made-up word with no historical basis in linguistics. Since this is literally a definition made up by anti-MAP activists in the mainstream media, with the primary intent of criminalising legal relationships, I recommend abstaining from using this word. It's a weapon against legal relationships, made up by our political enemies. If you want to talk about 'exploitation,' 'manipulation,' 'coercion,' etc. we already have words for that. The fact that the term is so amorphously ambiguous should be your first clue. It's a fake word, so I don't give it any legitimacy by using it.

[JGHeaven]

But as a kid I just felt guys were out of my league, why would a man with money and independence be interested in a kid who can't even stay out after dark? I had nothing to offer, he had everything, I didn't pursue guys mostly because it seemed pointless.

Not all men/older people have money or independence. Some adults may not like staying out after dark. Even if they did, when people love people so much, they may sacrifice those things becuase the person they desire to be with is more important. Some adults may love doing the same things younger age groups do. Not all adults like drinking, going to the pub or going to nightclubs. Also not all adults are interested or ready for sex, they may be virgins or lack the experience.

Yes but that's the impression I had. Men to me were simply out of my league, I could no more expect a man to be interested in me as I could expect a movie star be. It was very rare for a man to show any interest but when he did, I would show plenty of interest back.

I don't think guys understand usually. As a young girl I spent my time being talked down to by adults, being told what to do, it's crippling to self confidence. So the idea of an adult seeing me as more than just a kid rarely crossed my mind and if an adult did show interest then I was eager for more attention and interest. Grooming is just a term that describes having an interest and caring I think.

[ZeroXJoker]

It depends on the specific individuals and circumstances involved is what I choose. Are they adults that are monsters and prey on younger victims? Yes but I don't believe everyone who has a sexual relations with a minor is a monster. I certainly think it is possible for an adult and a minor to have a normal healthy relationship sexual or otherwise.

I do think society in general likes to tell those who do have sexual relationships or relationships in general with an adult that they are a victim and while there are victims not everyone is or sees what happened to them as bad. I had my first sexual experience with someone who was a teenager when I was 9 or 10 years old. I generally don't talk about it since I know people would tell me I was a victim but I wasn't. I wasn't a victim because he didn't force his way on me. I lost a bet and had to have his cock in my mouth as a result.