Multiple Paraphilias with no overlap?

[MAPGL917]

Does anyone else have different kinks or paraphelias that are separate from each other? I have a huge CnC kink that was discovered after a previous GF was heavy into it, which is basically a full blown rape fantasy now (couldn't actually do it, not by force. Sleeping or inebriated, probably. But if they cry even a littl, I couldn't). But, I can't imagine doing CnC, even with it being consensual, with a minor female. Like assuming AoC got lowered to 13, I don't think I could be that rough or violent with a girl that age. Maybe it's the cute, innocent mental image, that has me attracted to them to begin with, that prevents it? Anyone else have kinks that don't apply towards minors?

[John_Doe]

Does anyone else have different kinks or paraphelias that are separate from each other? I have a huge CnC kink that was discovered after a previous GF was heavy into it, which is basically a full blown rape fantasy now (couldn't actually do it, not by force. Sleeping or inebriated, probably. But if they cry even a littl, I couldn't). But, I can't imagine doing CnC, even with it being consensual, with a minor female. Like assuming AoC got lowered to 13, I don't think I could be that rough or violent with a girl that age. Maybe it's the cute, innocent mental image, that has me attracted to them to begin with, that prevents it? Anyone else have kinks that don't apply towards minors?

I used to be turned on by the idea of throat fucking a girl until she vomited all over her own face (i.e. if she was on her back and giving upside down fellatio, I'm not sure how to describe it but you might have seen this in some porn videos. I considered mentioning this and some other things in a thread months ago but never got around to it/decided to keep it to myself), ever since I saw some vomit-blow job video back when I was 19 or 20 (so 2005 or 2006). It sounds harsh but in my fantasy it would be exciting for her too and we'd intermittently make out afterward, vomit and all (I've also been turned on by the idea of making out with a woman after a 'cum facial' but I've been wondering for a long time if they're necessarily better for porn/fantasy. I remember they used to be so shockingly erotic for me, the visual/idea still is to some degree, but as early as maybe 20 I remember regretting that I somewhat lost interest in them. In real life, I would feel unsatiated if I orgasmed through anything other than vaginal intercourse; even cream pies are off-putting to me because it's almost like a rejection of me or an undoing of my work and there's a peace and sense of connection that comes with the idea of ejaculating deep inside of a woman's vagina for me, but even if I could get into cumming inside of someone's mouth standing in front of them just masturbating with no meaningful contact for something that you might not be able to fully appreciate once you're finished seems pointless to me. It works for fantasy and there's nothing wrong with unrealistic fantasies but I don't know how into it I would be in real life. Sorry for the extremely long side point, I don't know what's wrong with me; I will add that with my erectile dysfunction oral sex might be the only sexual contact I could realistically hope for, as extremely unrealistic as even that much is). I haven't fantasized about this in several months, maybe years, not because it's not still appealing on some level but because it's unnecessary (I never 'needed' it in the way that some people apparently need their 'fetishes' to be stimulated) but when I did I never thought about doing that to a child or minor (I don't typically think about children to begin with, probably even less so now than in the past, and I'm not exposed enough to young teens to be thinking about them on a regular). I also used to fantasize about scat play for the sake of being freaky/pushing boundaries (the scat in porn generally disgusts me, off the top of my head I can think of one video several years ago that turned me on. In real life the smell would turn me off and once my libido was gone it might be the nastiest mess to have to clean up ever, never mind the health problems with e.coli etc. Again, fantasies can have a built-in lack of realism that works great for imagination. I also haven't fantasized about that in a long, long time, unlike my vomit fetish I wouldn't be open to scat play in any real life scenario).

I don't think it's that I avoided this on principle, it's not necessarily that I felt it would be harsh or cruel to do that to such a young person as it might be that it never occurred to me or maybe even that it felt unrealistic (I've mentioned elsewhere that for a long time it was hard for me to sexualize prepubescent girls because their having high libidos or even knowing what they're doing in some areas felt unrealistic. Even now, in any 'real-life' scenario; 'real-life' in the sense that would occur outside of my head but not in the sense of taking place in the world as it actually is, my ideal partner would have a fully developed libido and be capable of arousal induced vaginal lubrication. I wouldn't wish menstruation on anyone, and blood makes me uncomfortable, but my ideal partner would have a menstrual cycle; i.e. a sexual body. When I feel relatively attracted to presumably prepubescent girls, I think it's because their bodies are giving off some of the same cues as a woman's body but it might be a 'trick.' As cold as this might be to say, it's arguably like seeing an attractive transgendered woman and responding to her, on some level, as though she were a biological woman but in the realization that she's actually a biological man I wouldn't actually want to have a sexual relationship with her; although the thought might occasionally cross my mind in terms of fantasy, but it's not because of social stigma or shame I would feel if people thought that it made me 'gay' but that the cues she's giving off are a misrepresentation or an 'illusion,' I don't want to elaborate). I have fantasized about prepubescent girls performing oral sex on me, in any 'real life' scenario I'd probably feel that an erotic relationship between a man and a girl should revolve around him performing oral sex on her, making out, nude cuddling, bathing or showering together etc. and I'm deliberate in saying 'feel' because I can't necessarily justify what I might be wary about in practice. In my fantasy, the 'rough sex' I might be interested in wouldn't be uncomfortable or unpleasant for my partner so even if it realistically would be in practice, that's irrelevant to my fantasy ideal. I would prefer a partner with a child's innocence and lack of 'adult' malice or cruelty and an adult inclination toward intentionally ambiguous communication (obviously some adults are very sweet and some children can even be very cruel; maybe not 5-year-olds, but I won't get into what you can expect from adults that is basically a non-issue with children) but a womanly body.

I have to say, a lot of young teens don't strike me as particularly 'innocent.' A lot of 12-15-year-olds are, it seems, to me, that a lot of people lose their youthful sweetness after that age, but I don't think the difference between them and 'adults' is really pronounced. I've never been attracted to the idea of young teens because of a 'cute and innocent' image that I have of them (I honestly just don't make much intuitive distinction between girls and women in their teens, twenties and thirties. When I fantasize about young girls, the age gap is normally not a factor or mentioned/notable or I might be their age, I don't really have the personality required to play the 'masculine' role in traditional romantic relationships, I've never been excited by the idea of being a teacher sleeping with one of his students but I have tried to explore that or a general older male father figure theme at times in that it's my job as the adult to take care of her or because of the stigma we're not supposed to fall in love/have sex but she wears me down etc. One recurring fantasy theme I've played with involves me as an older teenager and I have a friend who's mean to his little sister; say, 12/13ish, maybe even an exceptionally attractive 11-year old, and I come to her rescue and act like a caring big brother to her, or maybe she's my foster sister etc. etc. This is already too long). What is CnC? The idea of sex with an unconscious body is boring to me, fantasizing about it would be like fantasizing about masturbation. Drunk girls I could get into (I'm not talking about people who are only consenting after they got drunk, I mean someone who consents prior to getting drunk. I like to think of sex as primal, animalistic and non-'rational' anyway).

[MapGuyAgain]

Does anyone else have different kinks or paraphelias that are separate from each other? I have a huge CnC kink that was discovered after a previous GF was heavy into it, which is basically a full blown rape fantasy now (couldn't actually do it, not by force. Sleeping or inebriated, probably. But if they cry even a littl, I couldn't). But, I can't imagine doing CnC, even with it being consensual, with a minor female. Like assuming AoC got lowered to 13, I don't think I could be that rough or violent with a girl that age. Maybe it's the cute, innocent mental image, that has me attracted to them to begin with, that prevents it? Anyone else have kinks that don't apply towards minors?

Personally I reject the idea of paraphilias, it seems to me all that exists are Evolved sexual preferences, they exist to serve gene copying, and it seems psychology arbitrarily invents these as an extension of sexual taboo enforcement. Think of it like a soft modern way to keep the enforcement arm. I would have no problem being rough with a 13 year old, in fact I think she'd like it.

[BLueRibbon]

Does anyone else have different kinks or paraphelias that are separate from each other? I have a huge CnC kink that was discovered after a previous GF was heavy into it, which is basically a full blown rape fantasy now (couldn't actually do it, not by force. Sleeping or inebriated, probably. But if they cry even a littl, I couldn't). But, I can't imagine doing CnC, even with it being consensual, with a minor female. Like assuming AoC got lowered to 13, I don't think I could be that rough or violent with a girl that age. Maybe it's the cute, innocent mental image, that has me attracted to them to begin with, that prevents it? Anyone else have kinks that don't apply towards minors?

Personally I reject the idea of paraphilias, it seems to me all that exists are Evolved sexual preferences, they exist to serve gene copying, and it seems psychology arbitrarily invents these as an extension of sexual taboo enforcement. Think of it like a soft modern way to keep the enforcement arm. I would have no problem being rough with a 13 year old, in fact I think she'd like it.

I doubt the average 13 year old girl would enjoy rough sex. Please make sure that remains a fantasy.

[John_Doe]

Does anyone else have different kinks or paraphelias that are separate from each other? I have a huge CnC kink that was discovered after a previous GF was heavy into it, which is basically a full blown rape fantasy now (couldn't actually do it, not by force. Sleeping or inebriated, probably. But if they cry even a littl, I couldn't). But, I can't imagine doing CnC, even with it being consensual, with a minor female. Like assuming AoC got lowered to 13, I don't think I could be that rough or violent with a girl that age. Maybe it's the cute, innocent mental image, that has me attracted to them to begin with, that prevents it? Anyone else have kinks that don't apply towards minors?

Personally I reject the idea of paraphilias, it seems to me all that exists are Evolved sexual preferences, they exist to serve gene copying, and it seems psychology arbitrarily invents these as an extension of sexual taboo enforcement. Think of it like a soft modern way to keep the enforcement arm. I would have no problem being rough with a 13 year old, in fact I think she'd like it.

Not all sexual preferences enable gene propagation, even indirectly. I'm sure some behavior is truly maladaptive, to deny that some genetic mutations could be maladaptive would render the whole concept of natural selection meaningless. I'm always happy when people reject psychiatric authority, and I agree that paraphilias being disorders or health problems is just incoherent bad science used to enforce moral norms but if a 'paraphilia' is simply an atypical sexual preference, or one that is maladaptive, then 'paraphilias' exist even if they aren't bad (if they are bad, it's not for psychiatrsts as psychiatrists to determine).

I doubt the average 13 year old girl would enjoy rough sex. Please make sure that remains a fantasy.

BLueRibbon,

Depending on what you mean by 'rough sex' I don't have a hard time believing that some 13-year-old girls are into it, or at least I don't think that they're any likely to be less interested in it than grown women are. I might assume the same about a child (say, an 8-year-old) but I'm sure there would be individual variation. I've heard many women say that they fantasized about sex, and some had various 'fetishes,' at surprisingly young ages but I intuit that whether or not they've started menstruating would be a factor (I had crushes and remember daydreaming about sex as a child; I even remember masturbating an object once without ejaculating, etc. but I don't think I started masturbating regularly until I became capable of ejaculation at 12, so I have to ask myself why).

I wouldn't be surprised if the majority of children (maybe around 6/7 and/or older because toddlers and maybe even older children under 6 seem to lack strong disgust) thought that performing oral sex was gross. I don't want to deny child sexuality (and I don't ever remember finding cunnilingus disgusting), but part of the appeal might be knowing what it's doing for the other person so it might be more interesting for people with a higher libido. Again, people's accounts of child sexuality make it harder for me to box sexuality in this neat way that I could be inclined to (i.e. treating puberty as the start of it).

I wonder if part of the reason why I've always had difficulty thinking of young teens as children is because I can remember being 13, 14 etc. with much more clearness than I can remember being 10 (I can still remember much of being 10 and have some interests in common with my 10-year-old self but every once in a while I'll see myself in an old photo or read a school report and be surprised at how different my 10-year-old self and I seem to be. Some of those old reports are brutal though, they seem unfair but I'm biased, apparently I was disruptive, complained etc. at times), and even more than I can remember being 8, 7, 6, etc. I can remember the names of most of my kindergarten-gr.8 teachers but I'm missing the grade 3 one. I was reading mostly adult non-fiction at 13, and books intended for adults exclusively (I didn't start reading middle grade fiction, or Archie comics, again until my 20s). At my core I might be the same as my 17-year-old self. What I'd consider to be my basic worldview goes back to 26 even though personality is more than that, I'm sure. Other people seem farther removed from who they were when they were teenagers but I remember what it was like to be a 13-year-old, albeit a male one. Average 14/15-year-olds might be significantly more mature than average 13-year-olds (although I was 14 the last time my father could bully me to tears. I remember crying at 15 and/or 16 to beautiful music but not out of stress. Actually, there might have been one time when I was 17 or 18. I won't count tearing up at certain scenes in movies/tv shows, sentimentalism in my head, having to control myself when speaking about my cat who had recently died etc. Not that I think crying is 'immature').