It is socially perilous to tell people that you are attracted to children?

[pedo233]

My dad made me an appointment with a therapist in a few days (for other reasons, he thinks im depressed, he doesnt know about my sexual preferences). Anyways, i am tempted to tell this therapist about my sexual preferences. I'm 20, Before I was 16, i had a preference for adult women that have big breasts and butts, but when I was 16 I became attracted to women that have small breasts and butts and developed a sexual preference for them. I also feel attracted to preteen girls.

This is one of the main problems in my life and it has an effect on my self esteem, but i dont know if its a good idea to admit this to a therapist, I feel like they might tell my father or somehow someone will find out about it. Not to mention that I just feel uncomfortable talking about it but its been affecting my life for a long time. Do you think I should tell the therapist about it or should I not?

[Theendoftheline]

No!!!! The general rule is NEVER EVER tell.....unless you REALLY have a strong bond with that person even then doing so can ruin it in an instant. Many people become truly and utterly unhinged at things like that.

As for a therapist.....tred with extreme caution. If they even so much as suspect you do ANYTHING illegal even so much as look at lolicon/shotacon, and feel you are in anyway at all a threat to children you'll be reported to law enforcement and raided. Rights do not matter when it comes to MAPS, only "emotions" do.

I get it it sucks it REALLY fucking sucks but you have to be careful

[OnionPetal]

I don't know what country you're in (and you probably shouldn't say), but some countries have 'mandated reporting laws', where the therapist is required to report you to law enforcement if they so much as feel that you might be a danger to children. Others will find exceptions to the 'confidentiality' that has been promised.

Most therapist training programmes are implicitly anti-MAP, and clinical psychology students have been expelled from universities for merely admitting that they struggle with minor attraction. So it's likely that most licensed therapists coming from the official pathways (i.e., virtually all of them) are similarly biased. And if the therapist/counsellor is not a MAP and is not specifically trained on MAP issues (most are not), then how are they going to offer support for anything specifically MAP-related?

Many MAPs who have sought such 'treatment' (if you can call 'talk therapy' a 'treatment') report that therapists prioritise the wellbeing of any minors that might be around the 'patient'. The wellbeing of the 'patient' is often treated as secondary. Many therapists/counsellors refuse to 'treat' MAPs altogether, even after having a seemingly 'trusted relationship' with the client.

You should also be honest with yourself on what you hope to get out of 'therapy'. Be aware that there is absolutely zero evidence that 'conversion therapy' is effective for MAPs, in case that's something you were thinking of. That would probably cause you a lot more harm.

If you really must talk to a therapist about MAP-related issues like depression or social alienation, you should do some research to find one that specialises in MAP-related issues. b4uact.org has a list of MAP-friendly counselors and other resources.

Peer-support might be a better option. There are some sites like LifeLine.chat and B4U-ACT's Peer Support Forum that specialise in peer support for MAPs. Because usually minor-attracted peers are going to understand better what you're going through, than some middle class therapist who is paid to care, but who likely never read more than a paragraph on actual MAP issues in any of her university textbooks.

I am personally biased against 'therapists', so take this last bit with a pinch of salt. But I also don't like the fact that your father signed you - an adult - up for something healthcare-related like this. If you want 'help' with 'depression', that should be your decision, and not based on your father's informal diagnosis. In my opinion, most of those 'therapists' are in it for the money. I GUARANTEE that if you go in, they will find something to 'treat', so that they can keep getting paid. They will gain your 'trust', and then keep you coming back forever with new things to 'work on'. You'll never be 'cured'. That's the scam. If you have an actual medical issue, see a real medical doctor. Not some quack psycho-analyst who spent more time learning about the Oedipus complex than anything MAPs face today.

[Theendoftheline]

Most therapist training programmes are implicitly anti-MAP, and clinical psychology students have been expelled from universities for merely admitting that they struggle with minor attraction. So it's likely that most licensed therapists coming from the official pathways (i.e., virtually all of them) are similarly biased. And if the therapist/counsellor is not a MAP and is not specifically trained on MAP issues (most are not), then how are they going to offer support for anything specifically MAP-related?

almost like they don't give a FUCK about children. If they wanted to protect children or "protect" children wouldn't they want more people in the profession that could better understand minor attraction and how to help maps better deal with their feelings? just another example of virtue signaling bullshit that actually does more harm than good but MAP= pure EVIL to almost everyone so they do not give a shit they just do what society says is the "moral" thing....

Also I figure a few do know that AAM's exist and would prolly be afraid that an AAM would get help from them and might actually validate the childs feelings in some way.

[pedo233]

some countries have 'mandated reporting laws'

Which ones?

You should also be honest with yourself on what you hope to get out of 'therapy'.

I don't care to change my preferences, unless the solution is simple, but I always wanted to know why my sexual preferences changed. I suspected it changed because of porn addiction, but most people have told me i was always a pedophile and had a preference for women with small breasts and just didnt discover it until I was 16. I was hoping a therapist or psychiatrist or other expert could tell me.

But I also don't like the fact that your father signed you - an adult - up for something healthcare-related like this. If you want 'help' with 'depression', that should be your decision, and not based on your father's informal diagnosis.

My mother died a few months ago and he made an appointment for me with a therapist so i can talk to them about how i feel, he didnt really say its because he thinks im depressed. Although he definitely thinks i'm depressed and he's mentioned it many times before.

[OnionPetal]

I don't care to change my preferences, unless the solution is simple [...]

There is no simple 'solution'. And I would be incredibly sceptical about anyone who claims there is.

[...] but I always wanted to know why my sexual preferences changed. I suspected it changed because of porn addiction, but most people have told me i was always a pedophile and had a preference for women with small breasts and just didnt discover it until I was 16. I was hoping a therapist or psychiatrist or other expert could tell me.

There are a lot of highly intelligent MAPs on this site who follow the peer-reviewed research on this topic, more so than most 'talk therapists'. If nobody here can tell you the answer, then any 'therapist' will just be guessing at best, and bullshitting at worst. Most likely the answer has to come from inside you.

My mother died a few months ago and he made an appointment for me with a therapist so i can talk to them about how i feel, he didnt really say its because he thinks im depressed. Although he definitely thinks i'm depressed and he's mentioned it many times before.

I understand. Very sorry to hear about your loss. I guess he was thinking of something like grief therapy. If you decide to do that, I would leave the MAP stuff out of it. I get the sense that you are very honest, and want to confide in someone about this IRL. But it's okay to keep a secret like this, or just to seek peer support for the MAP-related issues from other MAPs. You are like a witch during the height of the European Witch Craze. It can still be very dangerous to confess your feelings to the wrong 'therapist'.

[Zmap]

It's so tempting I know and we all know brother but imagine how their look will change. How their eyes will see you as something less than human. As filth. As much as you would expect them to keep quiet you can't be sure and in a word where we are in constant danger you truly can't risk. As much as you think it would be reliving and sure it would you need to think about what saying anything carries. In my case I have been pondering telling my therapist in our very last appointment where they can do nothing to me but we'll see

[Theendoftheline]

It's so tempting I know and we all know brother but imagine how their look will change. How their eyes will see you as something less than human. As filth. As much as you would expect them to keep quiet you can't be sure and in a word where we are in constant danger you truly can't risk. As much as you think it would be reliving and sure it would you need to think about what saying anything carries. In my case I have been pondering telling my therapist in our very last appointment where they can do nothing to me but we'll see

Yup, even today someone I know was saying how it was fucked that certain people want the age of consent to be lowered to 14 and how messed up and weird it is. Really had to bite my tongue from saying "so why should youth have the right to have consensual sex with who they want" but right away knew if I said that I'd be public enemy number 1 and instantly viewed as a crazy filthy disgusting child molesting pedo.

Sadly we all just have to bit our tongue. Not worth it getting out and our lives being ruined for it. We think so e of us are depressed now imagine how more so we would be if people knew we liked under 18s.

[DashaVV]

I agree with everyone else here. Never tell anyone IRL. Ignore the temptation. Therapists are not special people, in fact a lot of them got into the business because they were fucked up as kids. You can't know who you're talking to or their biases, and something like this could blow past all their training. They won't care about helping you at all, their only concern would be to confirm that you are not a danger to someone else, and then they will report you. Suddenly, you're on record as a pedophile at the police department. Then you'll get a visit from child services, because even if you live alone with your dad, they'll suspect something is going on between you and him. So, then he'll know, too.

[pedoBL]

I told my best friend I was a gay pedophile - he said "How long have I known you, ive known forever, he was totally cool with it