Going forward

[BLueRibbon]

The recent Mu survey revealed the following trends among MAPs:

The key issues for our surveyed MAPs were those of misunderstanding and isolation from other members of society. Respondents were troubled by the conflation of attraction with action, and particularly upset about the belief that they were sadistic monsters who wanted to brutally assault screaming children. They explained that even their fantasies were non-violent in nature, and felt this was not well understood.

Reactions to coming out were generally more positive than we expected. Family members tended to react better than friends, and reactions to coming out as a boylover were overall more positive than reactions to coming out as a girllover. Many participants reported that while family and friends accepted them, their sexual orientation was rarely a topic of discussion.

Although being unable to relieve their sexual feelings was a problem for many participants, it was not the most serious problem. MAPs reported feeling exceptional empathy toward young people, believing they had a unique emotional connection with children that went beyond their sexual feelings. They felt they were unable to satisfy these emotional feelings due to the stigma of adult-child platonic relationships and the presumption that sexual abuse would be inevitable.

Getting 'caught out' in minor ways, such as someone picking up on their sexual interest in children, was a common traumatic experience for MAPs. It is clearly very difficult to perfectly hide such feelings for children. Reactions generally did not involve violence or police complaints, but did result in the breakdown of relationships with adult or child friends. Many MAPs reported their most traumatic experience to be the neverending nightmare of simply living among the barrage of hateful messaging. Of course, for those who experienced being arrested, this was their worst experience.

The constant hateful messaging also has negative effects on family and friends, as well as the wider community. It causes MAPs to be insecure in their relationships and not trust others, which may be confusing and hurtful to those who are unaware of the reason. For those who do know, especially close family members, there is often a significant fear of the consequences of the MAP being outed, potentially resulting in guilt by association.

Respondents raised a plethora of concerns about how MAP hysteria might affect children. These included the risk constant extreme messaging driving MAPs insane and thinking they must inevitably become monsters, the danger of the relentless hunt pushing MAPs underground, the conflation of violent and non-violent and violent actions due to all AMSC being labeled 'child rape', minors being afraid to report actual abusers due to the fear of consequences for themselves and the abuser, excessive limitations on youth sexual agency, constraints on platonic mentoring relationships and adult-child interaction in general, and the damage caused to those who realize they are MAPs during their formative teenage years.

In terms of change that MAPs hope to see in the future, the focus was primarily on awareness and understanding. Reforming Age of Consent laws and attitudes toward AMSC were discussed, but they were secondary to participants' desires to not be treated as evil monsters. Some people advocating AMSC-related reform predicated their demands on the basis that such changes are needed because the public is often incapable of drawing a distinction between attraction and action, and between violent and non-violent AMSC. Listening to the voices of young people was an important concern for some of our respondents, who felt that it was wrong for only adults to be speaking about an issue that affected the agency of youth.

Many participants saw positives in their attraction to children. Notably, they felt they had a gift for connection with children, and wouldn't want to lose this. Others discussed a greater tolerance for other marginalized groups, and a more open-minded perspective on issues in general.

Overall, the picture is one of MAPs suffering immensely from stigma, isolation and hatred. Legal prohibitions were a concern, but being unable to maintain a normal social life and experience platonic relationships with children were more serious problems. For representatives of the MAP community, and our allies, resolving these issues should be a key focus going forward.

With this information in mind, how should we advocate for a better world for MAPs?