Uneasiness

[PorcelainLark]

Hey, I'm back. I thought I should address the elephant in the room: having left. I'm not sure what to say about it, other than I was very angry at the time. I haven't been thinking as much about MAP related issues as I was before, but I missed the community. I'm going to try to avoid talking about politics this time. I have some strong beliefs, but I'll try to work around them.

[BLueRibbon]

Welcome back.

I personally suggest talking through your disagreements and trying to find common ground, but it doesn't work for everyone.

Whatever you decide regarding politics, we're happy to see you again.

[PorcelainLark]

Happy to be back.

[Pegasus]

Around here where I live, they say that soccer, politics and religion can't be discussed, as we all have different views on these subjects, and discussions would become tiresome and endless, with everyone trying to put forward their own arguments and getting nowhere.

[Fragment]

I was upset that you left. I think when all of society is against us we can have hair triggers. I know I've gotten into meaningless fights over things before, too. I did try my best to smooth things over, but I guess you weren't in the right mental space for it.

[PorcelainLark]

Around here where I live, they say that soccer, politics and religion can't be discussed, as we all have different views on these subjects, and discussions would become tiresome and endless, with everyone trying to put forward their own arguments and getting nowhere.

We have a similar expression where I live.

I was upset that you left. I think when all of society is against us we can have hair triggers. I know I've gotten into meaningless fights over things before, too. I did try my best to smooth things over, but I guess you weren't in the right mental space for it.

I'm sorry, I did feel genuinely bad about that; I like you guys, you've made me feel very welcome here, and it was pity it took me leaving to get a perspective on that. I've realized I need to work on my anger issues, because I make these rash decisions often, and then I usually end up regretting it (this wasn't the only community I left around that time, I had a heated argument in another community I'd been in for months and ended up leaving/getting banned, despite getting along with virtually everyone else except the one particular guy I was arguing with).
There's a Buddhist quote someone told me, that is becoming clearer to me: 'Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.' As much as I enjoy reading people the riot act, afterwards I end up feeling empty. I don't want to be outraged by everything, it doesn't feel great.

[Fragment]

I'm sorry, I did feel genuinely bad about that; I like you guys, you've made me feel very welcome here, and it was pity it took me leaving to get a perspective on that. I've realized I need to work on my anger issues, because I make these rash decisions often, and then I usually end up regretting it (this wasn't the only community I left around that time, I had a heated argument in another community I'd been in for months and ended up leaving/getting banned, despite getting along with virtually everyone else except the one particular guy I was arguing with).

I saw your post on B4um. I did try to understand that you were already worked up about the other community. I guess I need to get better at helping people calm down. I had hoped that what I said would be enough.

[PorcelainLark]

I saw your post on B4um. I did try to understand that you were already worked up about the other community. I guess I need to get better at helping people calm down. I had hoped that what I said would be enough.

Don't blame yourself, I'm a difficult person. I'm not great at maintaining friendships or controlling my emotions. I appreciated the effort though.