How do we get female pedophiles to care?

A place to talk about MAP/AAM-related issues in general. This includes the attraction itself, associated paraphilia/identities and AMSC/AMSR (Adult-Minor Sexual Contact and Relations).
Post Reply
AtosW
Posts: 23
Joined: Fri Jul 12, 2024 10:51 pm

How do we get female pedophiles to care?

Post by AtosW »

There are female pedophiles, sure. A lot of them. We know that much.

So why aren't they here? What are they doing?

Are they too busy luring 10-year old boys to their apartments without anybody ever suspecting anything foul, to bother caring about any others?

Or are they just too unsure about how to involve themselves? Do they feel unwelcome? Or do they, like many male MAPs do, just feel that there's no point in trying to make it more accepted, and the only way to go is keeping it hidden?

So how do we get them to care about the movement? Has there been any efforts by the MAP community to involve more females?

Because we know now that there certainly are some, thanks to certain art/fiction sites and accounts on Twitter etc. covering subjects that appeal to them. I really have no ideas myself, i've only had very little contact with some, and it hasn't given me any answers, but it's something that really should be discussed a lot more.
BLueRibbon
Posts: 411
Joined: Sat Jun 29, 2024 12:03 pm

Re: How do we get female pedophiles to care?

Post by BLueRibbon »

I doubt straight female MAPs have it as easy as you might believe. There is very little motivation, from the perspective of a boy, not to tell his friends that he got laid by a woman.
Brian Ribbon, Mu Co-Founder and Strategist

The Push
Pro-Reform
16/12
Peace
Posts: 21
Joined: Mon Jul 01, 2024 3:57 pm

Re: How do we get female pedophiles to care?

Post by Peace »

I think you make the mistake of assuming that female pedophiles don't care, and I think such a mistake speaks to how female pedophiles are perceived in the community. When they're seen as a rare unicorn, as necessarily having an easier time, then they may feel misunderstood and less likely to engage with the community.

Speaking of the BL community in particular, and as a trans man who was once female, some factors I've seen that could keep women from the community include:
  • Lack of women: Yes, it's circular logic. But a "boy's club" atmosphere can be hard to break down, and women may not want to deal with having to break it down in the first place. Perhaps there could be more female-only spaces, such as Butterfly Kisses was for lesbian pedophiles.
  • Pedophilia seen as a male phenomenon: Even if a woman comes out to herself as a pedophile, she may think of herself as the only one, or as different from other pedophiles. Related to the above, if she seeks out pedophile sites and sees that they're male-dominated, then her perception of herself as abnormal may be validated.
  • Sexism/male chauvinism: A problem that's plagued BL spaces since the beginning. Characterizations of women as emotional, deceitful, hysterical bitches who are always playing the victim; un-nuanced attacks against "feminism"; disparaging remarks about women's bodies and personalities. All of these are off-putting and certainly don't make women want to work with such men.
    (And to head off any arguments: yes, I'm aware women can be sexist toward men as well, and such sexism isn't good either)
  • Seeing man/boy love as the ideal: Boylove spaces and writings often take the tone that men and boys need each other and have special relationships. The special, non-maternal bonds between women and children are not spoken of, and so women may feel they don't "fit in" with such spaces.
Pegasus
Posts: 36
Joined: Wed Jul 10, 2024 11:52 am

Re: How do we get female pedophiles to care?

Post by Pegasus »

I believe that if a group of women set the ball rolling, they will call the others who hide in the forum pedophiles. Few of them claim to be women behind their aliases. And men need to be more open to them and let them in, after all we are here for a common love, children
Live life to the full.
User avatar
PorcelainLark
Posts: 192
Joined: Thu Aug 01, 2024 9:13 pm

Re: How do we get female pedophiles to care?

Post by PorcelainLark »

Women receive more unwanted sexual attention, and from an earlier age than men. Pedophilia is one issue they can ts pressure against this, because no one wants to be seen as defending pedophiles. Basically, either society has to loosen it's sexual boundaries (like during the sexual revolution) in which case unwanted sexual attention wouldn't be seen as a big deal, or you need to get rid of rape culture.
It's easier to understand why the first possibility isn't going to happen: if you're straight, would you really want to put up with being groped by gay men, or if you're an exclusive MAP would you really want to put up with being groped by a 70 year-old man or woman? Then there's the issue of STDs: a big part of why the sexual revolution went backwards was because of the AIDs crisis, which made casual sex potentially fatal.
So there's the possibility of getting rid of rape culture. Logically speaking, the the structure of the fear of MAPs is because of the equation "attraction = action", as though openly admitting to being attracted to children will lead to assault children. Again, think these in terms: under what conditions would you be comfortable with the open expression of the sexual attention of a 70 year-old of the sex you are unattracted to?

Combine this with the fact that women tend to be more concerned by following social conventions than men. Consider the fact that the majority of political extremists are male. As long as MAPs come across as an anti-social element (like the far right, religious extremists, or anarchists) women will avoid getting involved. We need to be more moderate, and socially conventional if we want more women to get involved.
After all, from women's perspective, why would they want to be involved with people that already disregard the biggest sexual boundary that almost everyone else agrees to? Note, I'm only aware of three cisgender female MAPs, and all three of them have made an explicit point of being opposed to rape culture (although, interestingly all three are pro-contact).
Formerly WandersGlade.
Male, Straight, non-exclusive.
Ideal AoA: 8-10.

To understand something is to be delivered of it. - Baruch Spinoza
User avatar
Fragment
Posts: 842
Joined: Sat Jun 29, 2024 12:08 pm

Re: How do we get female pedophiles to care?

Post by Fragment »

PorcelainLark wrote: Sat Aug 03, 2024 9:52 am As long as MAPs come across as an anti-social element (like the far right, religious extremists, or anarchists) women will avoid getting involved. We need to be more moderate, and socially conventional if we want more women to get involved.
I think this is huge. Obviously there have been women involved with more fringe ideologies (the aforementioned sexual liberation movement and sex-positive feminism or even more recently BLM) but typically women face stronger social sanctions for breaking consensus.
Communications Officer: Mu. Exclusive hebephile BL.

"Everywhere I see bliss, from which I alone am irrevocably excluded. I was benevolent and good; misery made me a fiend. Make me happy, and I shall again be virtuous."
~Frankenstein
NekoLovesFemaleMaps
Posts: 17
Joined: Mon Aug 19, 2024 1:48 am

Re: How do we get female pedophiles to care?

Post by NekoLovesFemaleMaps »

PorcelainLark wrote: Sat Aug 03, 2024 9:52 am Women receive more unwanted sexual attention, and from an earlier age than men. Pedophilia is one issue they can ts pressure against this, because no one wants to be seen as defending pedophiles. Basically, either society has to loosen it's sexual boundaries (like during the sexual revolution) in which case unwanted sexual attention wouldn't be seen as a big deal, or you need to get rid of rape culture.
It's easier to understand why the first possibility isn't going to happen: if you're straight, would you really want to put up with being groped by gay men, or if you're an exclusive MAP would you really want to put up with being groped by a 70 year-old man or woman? Then there's the issue of STDs: a big part of why the sexual revolution went backwards was because of the AIDs crisis, which made casual sex potentially fatal.
So there's the possibility of getting rid of rape culture. Logically speaking, the the structure of the fear of MAPs is because of the equation "attraction = action", as though openly admitting to being attracted to children will lead to assault children. Again, think these in terms: under what conditions would you be comfortable with the open expression of the sexual attention of a 70 year-old of the sex you are unattracted to?

Combine this with the fact that women tend to be more concerned by following social conventions than men. Consider the fact that the majority of political extremists are male. As long as MAPs come across as an anti-social element (like the far right, religious extremists, or anarchists) women will avoid getting involved. We need to be more moderate, and socially conventional if we want more women to get involved.
After all, from women's perspective, why would they want to be involved with people that already disregard the biggest sexual boundary that almost everyone else agrees to? Note, I'm only aware of three cisgender female MAPs, and all three of them have made an explicit point of being opposed to rape culture (although, interestingly all three are pro-contact).
Female maps are around and large in number too! The post i quoted is pretty good at covering the reasons they're often quieter.

Some of the female MAPs that Ive spoken to are turned off by the extremism that is often evident in these communities. Ive had many arguments with people who take contrarian viewpoints on matters that dont have anything to do with MAPs. I often argue against people who complain that all feminism is antisex, antimap, antichildren, antimale etc for example. There is a lot of racism within these communities, transphobia, and ageism. We're maps, duh, but people throwing around the term "granny" for any girl above the age of 13 is terribly annoying and degrading

Extreme views like the above just make map communities look more fringe, as if maps are all old out of touch males xD
Post Reply