To be shared anonymously, quietly, or defiantly by those who have acted from love where the law only sees crime.
I. PREFACE
This document is not an encouragement to break the law. It is a statement of moral resistance to laws that erase human experience, flatten complex relationships, and criminalize care. It is written for those who have found themselves called "monsters" not for harming, but for loving where the state has forbidden love.
We write not to provoke—but to testify.
"An unjust law is no law at all." — St. Augustine
II. THE PRINCIPLE OF NON-HARM
We hold that the defining moral feature of any intimate or relational act is not its legality, but the presence or absence of harm. Where there is no coercion, no deception, no exploitation, and no betrayal—where both parties share agency, trust, and emotional clarity—there is no ethical harm, even if the law says otherwise.
"Crime is nothing but the transgression of a law; and laws are nothing but the decrees of men. If they are unjust, they do not bind in conscience." — Lysander Spooner
III. YOUTH AS SUBJECTS
We reject the paternalistic doctrine that youth are incapable of meaningful agency in matters of emotional or physical intimacy. We affirm that adolescents—especially those approaching or within puberty—possess the cognitive, emotional, and moral faculties to consent to intimacy, provided they are informed, uncoerced, and genuinely engaged.
This principle extends further: we reject all presumptive age limitations that automatically deny subjectivity to younger individuals. We acknowledge that capacity for agency must be assessed contextually—not assumed based on chronological age alone.
We propose a universal ethic in which any person, regardless of age, may meaningfully express or revoke assent, and where the role of caregivers or the state is to support comprehension, not suppress experience.
"Children should be seen and heard—not silenced." — Adapted from traditional proverb
"The denial of agency to the young is not protection; it is a silencing that harms more than it heals." — Anonymous youth rights activist
IV. THE FAILURE OF LEGALISM
The law, in its current form, does not distinguish between harm and risk, nor between predation and connection. It criminalizes based on age alone, creating a world in which:
- Consent is a number, not a state of mind.
- Love is presumed to be abuse.
- The mere presence of intimacy is conflated with exploitation.
"There is no crueler tyranny than that which is perpetrated under the shield of law and in the name of justice." — Montesquieu
V. ILLEGALISM AS ETHICAL RESISTANCE
When the law denies truth, criminalizes tenderness, and demands false remorse, the act of defying that law—openly or in silence—becomes an act of moral resistance.
We affirm the ethical validity of those who have chosen to act in ways that the law forbids, not for pleasure, power, or manipulation, but out of love, care, and mutuality.
We recognize that such acts carry risk. We do not deny this. But we hold that personal integrity, when grounded in non-harmful mutuality, may require one to reject legality in favor of ethical truth.
"Every actual state is corrupt. Good men must not obey the laws too well." — Ralph Waldo Emerson
VI. PERSONAL NARRATIVE: THE WEIGHT OF LOVE IN EXILE
I was never reckless. I never sought power or submission. What I sought—and found—was connection: gentle, mutual, deliberate. He was 13. I was an adult. The law makes that the end of the story. But it wasn’t.
He knew himself. He knew me. We built trust, not confusion; joy, not harm. We shared stories, silences, curiosity, and care. It was never secret from him. It was never manipulative. If anything, I was the cautious one, afraid of a world that would see it as something vile.
When it ended—not between us, but by force—I was told to confess, to perform remorse. But I will not lie about what it was. I will not call him a victim to preserve a moral fiction. I lost my future, my freedom, and my place in the world. But I have not lost the truth.
This declaration is not an attempt to undo what has been done. It is a refusal to accept shame in place of memory. It is the small, unbreakable vow that what we shared mattered—and still does.
VII. CALL TO CONSCIENCE
To those who feel shame not because they harmed, but because the world refuses to see the difference:
- You are not alone.
- You are not evil.
- You are not beyond dignity.
"Disobedience, in the eyes of anyone who has read history, is man's original virtue." — Oscar Wilde
VIII. PRINCIPLES FOR A RESTORATIVE FUTURE
We envision a system not based on fear and punishment, but on mutual respect, recognition, and healing. To this end, we affirm these principles for a restorative and ethically grounded model of justice:
- Youth-led Definition of Harm: Only the adolescent themselves may determine whether harm occurred. Guardians may provide care, but not override voice.
- Revocable Assent: All individuals, regardless of age, may assent to intimacy—and revoke that assent at any time. Revocation must be respected and protected.
- Contextual Evaluation: Ethical evaluation must consider intent, honesty, emotional clarity, and mutual care—not only age difference.
- Non-carceral Justice: Where harm is found, the system must prioritize dialogue, restitution, and healing—not imprisonment or exile.
- Protection without Erasure: Safeguards for youth must empower, not infantilize. Education, consent literacy, and open communication must replace censorship and surveillance.
- Transparency over Secrecy: Silence breeds shame. A just system allows for safe and open acknowledgment of relationships, needs, and desires without criminal branding.
IX. DEDICATION
To those who have lost their voices to criminalization. To those who carry truth no one wants to hear. To those living in exile, not because they harmed, but because they loved honestly in a world that criminalizes honesty.
This declaration is for you.
Your dignity is not lost. Your memory is not erased. Your truth matters.
To speak a forbidden truth is not abuse. To love in the shadow of unjust law is not evil. To survive with integrity, even in exile, is the beginning of justice.
