A Map for MAPs

[Jim Burton]

A book written by a Virped psychiatrist, sample included.

https://www.amazon.com/Map-MAPs-Living- ... B0DYWMZ3FH

[WavesInEternity]

I'm glad that the book has been published, if only to further popularize the acronym "MAP" and to offer a non-hateful perspective on the topic, but...

"Minor attraction will always be connected to sexual abuse and exploitation."
[...]
"serious mental illness"

What a load of horseshit. This is exactly why I can't stand the Virtous Pedophile movement. He writes with the same perspective on the topic I held for the last 15+ years of my life and am now very happy to have left behind.

The sanctimonious and moralistic tone of the book also reminds me of why I dislike psychiatrists.

"Perhaps I see this condition too much from my own lens of guilt and shame."

In short, yes. At least he's somewhat aware of it. If only he had been more serious about trying to overcome the root sources of the guilt and shame.

"I know there are MAPs who strongly disagree with me. They enjoy being around children, and do not feel troubled about the sexual nature of their desires."

I'm so happy I reached that point in my life. The sort of discourse in that book would have been quite unhelpful.

[HumanBeing]

I'm glad that the book has been published, if only to further popularize the acronym "MAP" and to offer a non-hateful perspective on the topic, but...

"Minor attraction will always be connected to sexual abuse and exploitation."
[...]
"serious mental illness"

What a load of horseshit. This is exactly why I can't stand the Virtous Pedophile movement. He writes with the same perspective on the topic I held for the last 15+ years of my life and am now very happy to have left behind.

The sanctimonious and moralistic tone of the book also reminds me of why I dislike psychiatrists.

"Perhaps I see this condition too much from my own lens of guilt and shame."

In short, yes. At least he's somewhat aware of it. If only he had been more serious about trying to overcome the root sources of the guilt and shame.

"I know there are MAPs who strongly disagree with me. They enjoy being around children, and do not feel troubled about the sexual nature of their desires."

I'm so happy I reached that point in my life. The sort of discourse in that book would have been quite unhelpful.

Seeing the bullshit that most books tell about our sexual and romantic orientation makes me realize how lucky I was to learn about MAPs thanks to Ad van den Berg and MAP online communities, that's why I would NEVER advise any MAP to go to a psychologist or psychiatrist for MAP issues, they only want to make feel MAPs guilty and ashamed for "being monsters" and making profit for it.

[Fragment]

why I would NEVER advise any MAP to go to a psychologist or psychiatrist for MAP issues, they only want to make feel MAPs guilty and ashamed for "being monsters" and making profit for it.

One reason I'm happy to be in Japan (despite an overall poor awareness of mental health) is that my psychiatrist gives me drugs and doesn't care about my attraction at all, and my counselor is 95% focused on my depression and overall mental health, while seeing my attraction as a very minor footnote that is barely relevant given my current life situation.

Therapists involved with B4UAct are usually quite good, too. They see their job as "treating what the client wants help with" as opposed to "protecting children, even against the client's interests". Unfortunately most therapists would prioritize "protecting" unknown children over the mental health of the MAP client sitting right in front of them.

[PorcelainLark]

Minor attraction will always be connected to sexual abuse and exploitation.

Does he mean it will always lead to sexual abuse and exploitation or that it will always be stigmatized by the association with sexual abuse and exploitation?

It is not intended to recruit or convert anyone to be minor attracted. This is a serious illness to cope with, not an exotic lifestyle choice to be embraced.

This is such a weird thing to say. I guess his imagination never left the time when conversion therapy was taken seriously. Who, outside of elderly American Christians, thinks of sexuality as something you "recruit" people into?

I believe that developing a functional spirituality of some form is helpful, so I do not shy away from the topic, but I want to add a word of encouragement to the many atheists and agnostics out there. You are welcome here. I have been where you are. This is not a religious book. I do not believe any single faith possesses a monopoly on the path to wisdom. But I encourage you to have an open mind about cultivating a spiritual practice, whether it be prayer, meditation, or just interacting with the natural world.

When I see this, it's hard not to escape the conclusion that the anti-contact perspective is motivated by religious guilt. I have no issue with religious people, but universal morality shouldn't be based on religious claims. The world includes people that don't feel guilt about our attraction and don't have religious feelings. A universal morality has to accommodate people like that as well.

Very few of us are satisfied with this sexuality.

As a non-exclusive MAP, I find it so weird that this comes up so often. Just because you're attracted to adults, doesn't mean you're going to have a sexually satisfying life. There are plenty of people who spend their whole lives as bachelors or end up as spinsters. A sexual relationship isn't a given, even if you're legally allowed to have it.

Coming to terms with this attraction is painful, particularly at first when we feel alone and overwhelmed.

It's funny, I've never had any difficulty accepting I'm a MAP. Feeling alone and overwhelmed came later.

You may think you are evil, or that you have committed sins no God could forgive. You are wrong.

Or you might thing there is no such thing as evil, only bad.

I'm not going to do any more line by line commentary. I'm glad he's trying to give a place to pedophilia, with respect to our subjectivity and agency; since the past has always treated MAPs as objects, obstacles that get in the way of a better society. However, I think he's too optimistic about society treating us fairly as long as we show contrition. I might even go the path of least resistance and become anti-contact if I thought it would make me safe. That's not the world we live in, though. Plus, feeling shame over things we didn't choose is gross, in my opinion.