Grooming

[Fragment]

I can't stop thinking of all the moments where I actually gave a damn and how they've been reinterpreted through the lens of grooming. Like nothing I did was ever real or for its own sake, it was merely instrumental. Every moment of care was a way of satisfying my lust for power, manipulation merely to satisfy my own deviant sexual desires.

When my students qualified for a national tournament and I took them to major theme park, it wasn’t because they did a great job and deserved a reward. Apparently it was because I wanted control. Power. To make them feel indebted to me so I could do what I wanted to them later.

When two of my students got into a fight, and one of them started crying once the adrenaline wore off, hugging into me, the fact that I didn’t push him away isn't because I wanted to be a rock for him, not because I thought he was fragile in that moment. No. It must’ve been my predatory need to break down physical boundaries so he'd be an easier mark later.

When a kid forgot to submit his allergy form before school camp and got served a plate with food he couldn’t eat half of, and I gave him some of mine, it wasn’t because I cared and wanted him to have something to eat while everyone else was eating. Of course, it was something darker. Everything I ever did had a hidden motive. I had a grooming tactic ready for every potential victim.

When a boy was taking the entrance exam to get into the school and had a panic attack during the first subject. I just smiled and told him, “As long as you calm down and focus on the other subjects, you still have a chance.” He got in. After, he told me that my words in that moment helped him get through. What masterful planning, I had him targeted, ready to victimize long before he even became my student.

[PorcelainLark]

This just in. Is being human grooming? Watch out for early warning signs of exploitation: having empathy toward children and being comfortable around them. Experts say emotional distance and being self-focused may be the key for adult to maintain healthy boundaries with children.

The legal system is pretty awful. I remember from family members going through divorces. I know it's not the same, though.

[Outis]

History is full of societies interpreting everything a victimised group as corrupt and evil. The Nazi's did it to the Jews, Rome did it to the Christians (cannibals that drink human blood in dark ceremonies), black slaves were only capable of acts of barbarism. It's a sickness in people that drives them to do this and it's often the most "enlightened" that drives it. Once the victims themselves, it was the wisdom of Christian leaders that condemned reclusive widowed women to be witches and anyone who questionned the church as the enemies of God.

Today it's the maps. Same story, same pattern, same techniques. If it wasn't us it would be somebody else. I don't get upset about it, in time it'll be somebody elses turn. It's just the insanity of human nature and the twisted societies they build along with the stories they invent and tell themselves to justify the terrible acts they commit against their fellow man.

[Bookshelf]

If two identical actions with identical outcomes with identical motivations can be interpreted differently based on society's perception of the person doing them, that's a clear a sign as any of deep rooted irrational prejudice. Society's normative views on grooming are contradictory and irrational at every step, it'll never not surprise me that it's not enough to convince antis that something is amiss.

A young boy has a neighbor. He's known this neighbor for around about 5~ years now, and he's fairly close with the family. The families eat at eachother's homes every so often. Once, when the boy was on a walk to football practice in the rain after forgetting his jacket, the neighbor happened to be driving by and offered him a lift. Nothing sexual ever happened, ever. This act of community kindness was just that — kindness.

Another young boy has a neighbor. He's known this neighbor for around about 5~ years now, and he's fairly close with the family. The families eat at eachother's homes every so often. Once, when the boy was on a walk to football practice in the rain after forgetting his jacket, the neighbor happened to be driving by and offered him a lift. Nothing sexual ever happened, ever; however 3 years later, it turns out the neighbor had illegal fictional CP on his computer. Now, this was an act of grooming. It was an evil man trying to lure a vulnerable young boy into a position where he could be potentially abused.

[lglove]

If the powers at be really wanted to, they can twist it so that smiling at a kid technically is considered grooming.

[Outis]

If two identical actions with identical outcomes with identical motivations can be interpreted differently based on society's perception of the person doing them, that's a clear a sign as any of deep rooted irrational prejudice. Society's normative views on grooming are contradictory and irrational at every step, it'll never not surprise me that it's not enough to convince antis that something is amiss.

A young boy has a neighbor. He's known this neighbor for around about 5~ years now, and he's fairly close with the family. The families eat at eachother's homes every so often. Once, when the boy was on a walk to football practice in the rain after forgetting his jacket, the neighbor happened to be driving by and offered him a lift. Nothing sexual ever happened, ever. This act of community kindness was just that — kindness.

Another young boy has a neighbor. He's known this neighbor for around about 5~ years now, and he's fairly close with the family. The families eat at eachother's homes every so often. Once, when the boy was on a walk to football practice in the rain after forgetting his jacket, the neighbor happened to be driving by and offered him a lift. Nothing sexual ever happened, ever; however 3 years later, it turns out the neighbor had illegal fictional CP on his computer. Now, this was an act of grooming. It was an evil man trying to lure a vulnerable young boy into a position where he could be potentially abused.

Totally, it's no different to saying a white man offering to walk a woman home is being a gentleman, a black man doing the same thing is a potential rapist. It's the characteristic of the person that is deciding a motivation, not the actions. It fear and hatred of a group alone that is what sits behind the term grooming.