Self intro

[WavesInEternity]

I'm much slower with making friends now, that's for sure. Even to the point that I haven't made any new ones over the last couple years. It also doesn't help that i rarely have the time, money, or desire to go out.

You should take that personality test.

I currently have a cousin, she's my cousins daughter, who I'm really close with, and she's 8. She'll be 9 this year. I first met her when she was 5, and she quickly decided that I was her favorite cousin. Well last summer, we were at a family gathering, and just before it was over, while I was playing with her and carrying her around in a princess hold (like carrying the bride across the threshold), she looked at me and said "I wouldn't mind if you took me home with you," and my heart melted while my excitement skyrocketed. So she got to come stay the night with me.

That's so adorable! I'd have taken her home too for sure! I sadly no longer have any family members in that age range, but it sure reminds me of some wonderful relationships I had with some cousins when I was a teenager and young adult. That 7-year-old cousin I mentioned is the reason I reluctantly accepted that I was a 'paedophile' (I didn't know the acronym MAP yet) when I was 15. I had such powerful feelings toward her. Holding her on my lap, or indeed in a princess hold, felt literally better than heroin & cocaine together. The best part is that she was super affectionate and cuddly with me, obviously sensing that there was something different about the way I interacted with her, and reciprocating despite all the asymmetry of our respective emotions. When I sat down, she'd often spontaneously run toward me to sit on my lap. Every time that happened, I felt like I was falling for her all over again.

[KryptikMisfit]

I took the test and posted the results on the thread. It was an interesting take on personality tests.

I know what you mean about the feelings. I've definitely got them for my cousin. I also had a step-daughter a few years back that I developed very strong feelings for. Strong enough that it took a long time to move on after I divorced her mom. My cousin isn't super cuddly with me, but my step-daughter was. I miss that feeling.

The part that hurts right now is that it seems my cousin has started to lose interest in visiting me. She hasn't wanted to come over whenever I've offered, and the last time I asked, she said she wanted to hang out with her family instead.

[WavesInEternity]

I took the test and posted the results on the thread. It was an interesting take on personality tests.

Unlike most other models of personality, which are based on a priori theories, the Big Five model was created using empirical data, and the associated tests were designed with the demands of the scientific method in mind: predictive power, reproducibility, verifiability. That makes it really stand out among such standardized tests, and it also means it's by far the most commonly used in academia.

I know what you mean about the feelings. I've definitely got them for my cousin. I also had a step-daughter a few years back that I developed very strong feelings for. Strong enough that it took a long time to move on after I divorced her mom. My cousin isn't super cuddly with me, but my step-daughter was. I miss that feeling.

The part that hurts right now is that it seems my cousin has started to lose interest in visiting me. She hasn't wanted to come over whenever I've offered, and the last time I asked, she said she wanted to hang out with her family instead.

I haven't had the opportunity to cuddle a girl in many years, I miss it horribly. I stopped seeing that cousin less than 3 years after I met her because of complicated family circumstances. It was painful on many levels... not just for my own feelings, but also because she was a neglected child with a difficult personal situation (divorced parents; a deadbeat mother on welfare and a father who was mentally impaired as a consequence of a brain tumour as a child), and she clearly sought affection from me because she wasn't getting enough love from those who should've been caring for her. It was so sad and I really did feel like taking her home... she needed love, and I wanted to give her love so bad. (If any anti is reading: no, I'd never have touched her sexually.)

[KryptikMisfit]

I haven't had the opportunity to cuddle a girl in many years, I miss it horribly. I stopped seeing that cousin less than 3 years after I met her because of complicated family circumstances. It was painful on many levels... not just for my own feelings, but also because she was a neglected child with a difficult personal situation (divorced parents; a deadbeat mother on welfare and a father who was mentally impaired as a consequence of a brain tumour as a child), and she clearly sought affection from me because she wasn't getting enough love from those who should've been caring for her. It was so sad and I really did feel like taking her home... she needed love, and I wanted to give her love so bad. (If any anti is reading: no, I'd never have touched her sexually.)

I'm sorry to hear that. That's one thing that people seem to always forget about, the kids feelings and needs. And you know they will only do the bare minimum for them when they DO care. That's actually one of the reasons I've been seriously considering adoption, even tho I know I can't afford it yet. I wanted to get the information I need to go through the process, and I'd love to be able to love and support a kid in need. Thanks to my experience as a step-dad, I've found a very strong desire to have a daughter, even if she didn't come from me.